Difficult employees. Chances are we all know one, or even work with one right now. Nothing can drive down productivity and morale like a difficult employee. However, you don’t need to let one abrasive employee ruin it for everyone else. With a little time and patience you can turn that negative Nancy into a productive Peter. Remember, a good conversation can, at the bottom line, help you decrease your turn over
- Go in with a clear head
First and foremost, take a deep breath. Getting upset wont do anything for anyone, and can often make matters worse. So before you go into any sort of interaction with this employee, remind yourself that they do not decide how you’re feeling. Chances are they are already upset, so one of you needs to keep a clear head, otherwise no progress will be made. Remind yourself that you are here, as a representative of the company, and you should compose yourself as such. Screaming and yelling will only result in both of you feeling worse than before, and can often times get you both in trouble. Don’t let one employees negative attitude become contagious.
Don’t let one employees negative attitude become contagious.
2. Listen to what they are saying
Now that you have taken a deep, cleansing breath, and cleared your head, you are ready for (In my opinion) the most important part: Listening. Something is obviously frustrating this difficult employee, so do both of you a favor and listen. Really listen. You can’t get to the root of the problem until you really know what the problem is. One of my favorite videos on Youtube right now is “It’s not about the nail”, which can be seen below. I highly suggest that anyone who is dealing with a difficult person, wether at work or in your personal life, watch this video. The premise is simple. A young woman has a nail in her head. She is trying to talk to another person about it, however she cant speak because the other person is too focused on removing the nail completely. Yes, the nail needs to come out eventually, and it will, but for right now just let them talk. Don’t be too focused on removing it, otherwise another nail will just find its way back up there. Talk about what’s bothering your employee and, together, come up with a plan to remove it for good. After all, this problem is affecting you both, so it will take both of you, working together, to really get that nail out for good.
3. Be Clear, Concise and Consisten
Now that you have accurately listened to what is going on, its your turn to talk. Follow the three c’s to help the employee understand where you are coming from: Clear, Concise, and Consistent. Let the difficult employee know how their actions are affecting the office, or workflow. This isn’t a time to blame, accuse or yell. Instead use this opportunity to show the employee that you really do care, both about them, and the company in general. Talk to them like a human being, not a subordinate. As soon as you start talking down to them, all progress will be lost. Give them clear examples of how things have been effected by their actions. Stay consistent, the last thing you want to do right now is cause any more confusion.
Follow the three c’s to help the employee understand where you are coming from: Clear, Concise, and Consistent.
4. Create an action plan
Next comes the plan of action. You have discussed with the employee WHAT needs to change, now lets discuss HOW they are going to change. A clear plan of action can help you guide this difficult employee from problem causer to problem solver. Set clear, reachable goals. Remember, Rome was not built in a day, and chances are this employee cannot change completely in the matter of one afternoon. Work together with them to come up with a reasonable, achievable plan of action. This is a great opportunity to further smooth out the communication bumps, as well as showing them that you care. If you didn’t care about them, they would be gone. Sometimes all anyone needs is to just know that someone cares about them, and you could be that someone.
5. Work together to come up with consequences
Now that you have set a clear plan of action, now is the time to discuss consequences. This is the part of the conversation that things can take a turn for the tense. It’s up to you to ensure that it does not. Like I said above, keeping a clear head can be your best defense against this kind of thing. But that doesn’t mean you cant have a conversation with the difficult employee about these consequences. Sometimes having the difficult employee help you come up with consequences is a great way to help them realize just how serious things may be. Having them help you can create a great path of communication between the 2 of you. This will also help you later down the road. If things don’t change, and the employee must face those consequences, they really have no one to blame but themselves. After all, they helped you come up with the consequences, so they really have no argument when they have to face the music.
Before the conversation comes to a close, just run over everything on last time. Repeat the issues the employee shared with you, go back over the plan of action, and re-iterate the consequences should nothing change. This is a great way to wrap your entire conversation up in a concise manner.
Remember, every employee is different. Sometimes adjustments must be made, but following these steps will help you open a dialogue instead of starting an argument. With this guide you will be able to handle your next difficult employee like a champ. Remember, even the most productive employees can become a problem, check out our article on what turns a talented employee into a disengaged worker for more information.
Have any techniques that have worked for you in the past? Feel free to share them.
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